Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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