Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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