Plan B is the new Plan A
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize