wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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