So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I skipped work to stalk him.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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