I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
