Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize