whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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