Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
