Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
