meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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