hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
