So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
