he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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