Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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