Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
