Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
