I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
