ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Randomize