please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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