i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
