At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
