do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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