Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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