I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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