I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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