Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Randomize
