Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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