We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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