What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
