'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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