It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
nutella sex= disaster
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
