no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
