I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
how can u be prego again
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Randomize
