What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I have post one night stand depression
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize