You can't special order awesome
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
