He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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