Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
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