I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
