your parents love me but you hate me
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
