Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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