some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
