If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
