O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Four minutes until I can fart!
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize