as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
