somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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