Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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