Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
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