You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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