I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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