Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
