No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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