Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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